Hey Jude

Jude Law has good taste in women. Too bad he fucked it up with both of them. Sadie Frost has been bagged out of late for dating younger men. That old strumpet... Last week someone asked her why she always went out with men younger than her... "Because men my age are already married or settled..." There you go people. The universal truth that no one wants to hear. So fuck you all. Then there's Sienna Miller who came out this week and said her longest and best relationship has been with wine. I have a new appreciation for that woman. Oh yeah, she's fantastic in Factory Girl as Edie Sedgwick... amazing. I too love younger men and wine. Why? All the men my age are already married and wine is always there for me and never lets me down. Bravo Sadie and Sienna.

Nobody Loves You When You're Down and Out

I'm having a weird day. I woke up this morning with full make up on and my contacts still in on the couch where I passed out last night. I got all gussied up and went to see the Nekromantix only to find the fuckers sold out and I had to turn my purdy self around and come home! Next time, get a bloody ticket on time MM!! I scraped off my make up, got dressed and went out to the local Salvos to indulge in one of my favourite passions when I have the time- op shopping. For a shop that large they sure had a lot of shit. I managed to find a very cool pair of shoes in my size and a fun handbag which set me back $15.. On the way home, a sense of melancholy set in. I came home and had a huge cry. I still feel a bit crappy and emotional. Life is changing and moving on. I've come to the realisation that my nearest and dearest aren't my nearest and dearest anymore. I make the effort as you do to contact them and try to get together but lately, no one has made that particular effort for me. All my friends are in coupledom and hey guess who isn't and never is? Me!! I usually play the martyr and do the 'what have I done wrong' 'what can I do to make it all right' crap and I can't do it anymore. I just want to accept that people move on and that I don't fit into anyone's mold. I never have and I don't think I ever will. I've always been like oil in water or the proverbial square peg. And that suits me fine. The more I accept these facts, the more I feel comfortable in my own skin and the happier I feel. I still love those girls and I'm ready to let go and let them move on. I too long for a man to couple with but as I've reported in many a blog- I want to find the right man as my girls have done. Sometimes I feel like I've burnt out my man karma by the shag fests I went on a few years back and this period of forced celibacy is my penance. Who knows? The universe needs to be balanced- it's the law of nature. You take and you have to give back. I didn't write the rules- they just are. I am in a deep and lonely hole at the moment. I feel like I have no one to turn to except this blog. I know I'm a good person and I have a lot to give. I just don't have the credentials and the kudos that people expect you to have. For better or worse- I am who I am. You can either like me or lump me. Looks like the menfolk lump me a lot! Sometimes I just wish to meet someone lovely to spend even a weekend with. Someone who'll kiss and hold me. Someone to make me feel like a sexy woman again. To feel like a sexual being. To be told I'm beautiful. To feel generally wanted by a man. I know this makes me sound pathetic but I don't care. So as I type away, tears rolling down my face- I still have no real answer as to what I'm going to do. Tonight,I'm going to dinner with David,Di and Sabrina as Sabrina is moving back to Sydney. I will miss her. At least I she's not far away and I can see her when I'm up in Sydney next. Tomorrow is our Cinema Exotica night at Tiki which should be a cracker of a night. I'm looking forward to dressing up and having a great time. I'm so hoping with everything I am that we get lots of people through the door. Thanks for stopping by and reading this tale of woe and blah...

A Tale Of Two Markets

I hate fucking hippies. Let me reiterate that... I HATE fucking hippies! Let me rephrase this: I hate middle class people who think they have a conscience about things that matter, don a pair of Thai fishermans pants, those shitty plastic clog things and a Nepalese beanie and start working in some sustainable farming industry thinking they are making the world a better place. Honey, you aren't and I'll tell you why. This morning, my friend and I got up early (reminder- it's a Saturday so this is a sacred thing) to go to an organic community project they have called Ceres. We have been told good things about it so we were excited about going to check it out and buy our organic produce here. From the time we got there, there were signs saying 'don't do this or don't do that'. We had to leave the dog in a certain area as it is not dog friendly, leaving poor little Dottie to whelp from seperation anxiety. The produce was really expensive so I only picked out a few items. The queue to pay for them was quite lengthy so I decided to go to their little organic shop as I need to get some popcorn seeds and some quinoa. Once I had them, I went back out and the queue was gone. I walked up to the table waiting to be served, only to have the 4 gonks behind it stare at me. It was only when the lady behind me said 'are you being served' and replied 'no' that something happen. The hippy bitch who served me was rude and grumpy, banging my vegies on the table after weighing and ringing them up and only spoke to me to tell me the price. My friend joined me a few moments later as she had to buy some mushrooms. Again, we were left standing there. Hippy bitch motioned to my friend to be served, only to ignore us once we got to the table. Apparantly, there was some rule about where and how you had to queue and we didn't get it right so instead of telling us how it is, they ignored us and gave us greasy looks. My friend dropped the bag of mushies on the table and said 'fuck this- let's go!'. I wish I had piffed mine at her head and demanded my money back. Christ on a bike- we were fuming when we left there. I am never going to that fucking place again and rest assured, I am getting on the phone this Monday to let them know how 'organic' I think they are. We went back to my friend's to drop the dog off and then drove down to the Convent Gallery where they were having their monthly farmers market. Talk about taking a 180 degree turn in atmosphere and service- everyone was so nice and the produce was much cheaper. It was heaven after hippy hell. No tea cosy hats, dreadlocks or Birkenstocks and very dog friendly. We could have brought Dottie along if we wanted to. I had the yummiest chorizo sausage in a roll with barbequed baby leeks and a parsley and garlic sauce- heaven in bread. I'm so glad we went there otherwise I'd still be in the crappiest mood. After sitting down for a latte and a custard tart (my wheat consumption has been through the roof this week and my homeopath is NOT going to be pleased at all), I was one happy lady. I'm looking forward to my roast dinner tonight with all the winter veg I just bought and hope that hippy bitch chokes on her tofu.

Winter of Discontent

I'm tired. I'm aching in the places I used to play. I don't know whether I want to sleep or dance. In a bit of a bind. Time for a change. Anyone have any suggestions?